Death rates can double with weight gain, but in absolute terms, the personal risk to the overfed DMCB seems to be pretty small. The “hazard ratio” increases 30 to 100%, but the absolute odds that DMCB will survive the year along with the rest of its skinny colleagues is very very good.
Better, says the DMCB, to relax. That’s why, when it goes to the local mall for some holiday gift shopping and stops at the food court this season, it will fear not. Better, it says, to enjoy its shake, pizza and fries and celebrate.